Indefatigable Artist Podcast Episode 31 - Creative Roots
I have approached this podcast like I have ever other creative project I have worked on. Something that will live on after I am gone. Our time is so finite, gone in a flash, wasn’t it such a blast? Look around you now, nothing will last, where is he? Oh he died in a crash.
I want this to be a journal of my life in this point and time. again, Momentary Glimpses. Whatever is on my mind when I sit down to write. I want it to be free flowing, anything goes, nothing is off the table.
My mind goes down paths that I am most passionate about. As Kendrick says, stand for something or die in the morning. If you stand for nothing, if you are silent, than your life has no meaning on this planet. What is it you are passionate about? What are you doing about it? Are you suppressing it? Pushing it away, clouding it with “I have to do this, or I have to do that.” Where will that be when you’re gone. If you weren’t here to be anxious about, or depressed about whatever it is that is ailing you right now. This is me writing as someone else to myself, my other self, the one that mentally checks out and is forced to do what they are told.
This is my journal. I am approaching it as a writer who has grown his creative roots in the ground for the past 14 years.
This podcast has allowed me to come back to my roots as a creative.
I have ventured out and tried other media, and those will take years to develop as well. As an artist the learning process is lifelong.
But I feel like I have spread myself to thin. All of it interests me and I want to do it all, but I don’t have enough time. We all die not having enough time.
So what can I focus on that will have the effect that I want.
What is it that I want to do?
I have answered this in episode 21 more in depth, where I asked myself, if everything I created was deleted, if it was just me, what am I stripped down to the very core.
It’s the same answer here. What is it that I want to do if today were my last, what effect do I want to have?
That effect occurs through an energy, what energy do I want to give off to everything around me. The environment, the people, the animals, the air, the water. What effect do I want and how do I have that?
I meditate on this and think about this every single day that I am alive.
One of the main characters in the book, Skriller, stems from this internal voice I have had, the one constantly telling me I am not good enough, that I suck, that I should just give up, constantly questioning, why are you doing this instead of that? Why are you doing this when you haven’t done shit in your life. Incessantly weighing on my mind, every single day that wicked beast is there to taunt me.
But I have shown that beast love when I used to show it spiteful hate and anger, defacing myself. I have forgiven myself for my mistakes, I look at the past person now as one of my characters in my book. It’s no longer who I am in this moment. Living in the Right Now takes unlimited focus. Have to incessantly remind yourself to stay present, not to live in the future, or in the past, but Right Now. It’s constantly changing and there is always more to see. Look at the granular details, what could you be missing? – Oh I have seen this place every single day of my life. Ok, but what is ordinary to you will be extraordinary to someone else, someone who has never seen this place.
Be so present as to not even remember this place you awake in. Try to see it for the first time, can you remember the first time you saw this place you live in now, even if it’s the same town you grew up in. Think back to as far as you can go, how far is that? How old are you? Is that inner child still alive or have you cast them aside, put them in that sorrowful shade to hide, starved but undying, why are you still alive trying? You are awake crying, let it out, go to sleep and awake like you have been born anew, what is in the past cannot touch you here, not if you choose to be present in the infinite now, don’t focus on that false sense of self. This is a practice, it's not all at once.
For example, when my uncle passed away, and I feel now enough time has gone by where I can talk more openly about it. Now it does happen over time because getting over that hurt is a practice and life is constantly testing us, we think we have built this mental foundation, this solid fortress where you are king or queen of the castle, but there will always be a test.
People define their own definitions of ‘hard’ and ‘easy’ just as they have defined the word ‘impossible.’
What is impossible if a human isn’t around to speak it? Does the universe know the definition or is it just a limit humans have placed on their own minds?
Living is supposed to be what it is. Humans are the ones who have defined it as ‘hard’ why isn’t this easy?
What is easy? If I put you on a deserted island, how long until you can send an email? If you had to build everything from scratch. How long would it take you?
Sure, to make it relatable, living is hard, it’s supposed to be hard, dying is easy, you know how I know that for sure? There are way more people who have died than are living right now and we have just passed 8 billion people living on the planet, the most ever on this planet. There are still way more people who have lived and died and that’s just based on rough estimates.
The point is to say that living is supposed to be what it is. that’s it, take it or leave it. We are just advanced bacteria on a free-floating rock around burning gas inside something we don’t full understand and learning new things about every day through a telescope we just launched into space.
We have to be able to live longer if we are to venture further into space.
This venture into space will take years and years. What will keep these future humans entertained all of that time?
Technology makes us more human, not less.
I am able to type faster than I can write and it’s far more legible for others to read. My hand gets less tired typing than it does writing. Could you imagine how long each episode would take me to write if I had to do it with a quill under candlelight? Then what would I record my voice with if it weren’t for technology?
Fear sells tickets, movie tickets. Again, I am still seeing fear driven posts about AI that un-ironically reference movies to prove a point.
Evidence-based facts verse opinion-based beliefs, and humans in 2023, not knowing how to differentiate between the two. To take emotion out of the equation and to analyze the evidence before their own eyes.
I also don’t think people, homo sapiens as they are now, are intelligent enough to fully understand the universe. We are seeing that with the unidentified flying objects in the sky. Their technology can’t be explained.
What really struck me about the hearing was when they were talking about the different dimensions of reality, how some of the sightings felt like the craft was in another dimension and all they were seeing was like a shadow of their appearance in this reality. He described it as different planes of reality and there image was being cast like a shadow in this reality that humans perceive.
Now I know it’s a little geeky to keep using the word humans, but I just want it to be clear whom I am talking about exactly and to kill the ego a bit, that we have developed with ourselves. I see it especially in the younger generation that has grown up within the internet. It’s like they are so deluded they feel like everything is figured out in life, that this is the way people live and will always live this way. It’s perfectly normal to spend 8 hours a day on an ipad, if not more! Kids looking for their ipad first thing in the morning, to place that big LED screen in front of their sleepy little eyes, then wonder why laser eye surgery has skyrocketed in the past 10 years, thousands of LED lights buring a hole through the back of their retina, frying the front of their brain with so many images and sounds, to look at another human face they seem zoned out. They don’t know how to talk, they just stare awkwardly, and this continues as they get older, they are much better at talking through a social media app, or a text then to your face, they say things online they would never say in front of a large group.
What kind of energy is that putting out?
How do we say this form of manipulation is stronger than anything humans have ever faced? When do we acknowledge that it’s too late? That people are going to be living in their own realities, their timelines furthering the divide, to the point where they may be living on the same planet, but mentally they are in different galaxies, different dimensions of reality. Like the unidentified aircraft we see.
I wrote my novels on a free-floating planet that runs into other planets, of course I am interested in other life forms, this universe is far to vast to not have other life, it’s only a matter of time until we encounter more. Some we are going to more advanced than, others not. I think more advanced life forms will not be as hostile as us, that is a fault humans have, being hostile towards others, I don’t think that hostility will be seen in all other forms of life. Just look at other species on this planet, how many other animals kill for fun? They simply kill to survive, they don’t kill more than they can eat, til they become obese, unable to get out of their own bed.
I work on my flaws and try to bring solutions to the table, not just simply point out problems all of the time. I can point this or that out, but what I am I going to choose to do about it?
Choose to focus my time on what I can do about it. I can write about it, I can talk about it allegorically to hopefully get others to see these problems in a new light, with a different perspective.
We will live and die on one planet.
We may be one of the last generations to say that.
Humans are a nomadic species, meant to travel. We have now traveled all over this planet, one of a few species to do that, and now we are taking that deep need to venture to other planets.
I just hope Bleace goes along for the journey. Helps entertain these future species as they travel the cosmos.
I want this podcast to be a journal of my life, with every episode being a new entry to capture this moment of time. Whatever is on my mind when I sit down to write. I want it to be free flowing, anything goes, nothing is off the table.
And if this my last episode ever, and one of these times that will be true, so I want to say it now, because if not now, when? But I just want to say before I go, one last thing and if it’s the last thing I ever say I want it to be this -